Airport Screening Results for June

June Statistics on Airport Screening from The Department Of Homeland Security:

Terrorists Discovered - 0

Transvestites - 133

Hernias - 1,485

Hemorrhoid Cases - 3,172

Enlarged Prostates - 8,249

Breast Implants - 59,350

Natural Blondes - 3

It was also discovered that 535 members of Congress had no balls.